As the cosmic curtain falls on another exhilarating season of Wildcard, hosts Goodlander and Saunders bid farewell to Frostburn Asteroid. The thrill and frenzy of this season have left them breathless, from Locke's triumphant win to the surprising twist in the cheating scandal. The truth behind the past cheating controversy takes a surprising turn, shifting the blame from Spord to none other than Chronian Crown, Prince Boone. As the media frenzy ensues, with Jot Rustin's mysterious disappearance taking center stage, the duo finds themselves at the heart of a whirlwind of revelations and speculations. The line between news and personal loyalty blurs, showcasing the unique dynamic that keeps WBN viewers coming back for more cosmic mayhem and unexpected twists.
Who's pumped for this? I know I am.
Welcome back to WBN. I'm Reno Saunders.
I'm Gareth. Goodlander. Definitely not a washcloth.
It's time to say goodbye to Frostburn Asteroid for now, because another season of Wildcard is in the book.
And we're okay with that?
Yes, we are. Because it was the wildest one yet.
This win for Locke and Team Chronos. My guys, it has nourished my soul. I feel fecund with joy, embarrassed at the abundance of meaning I now find in my life.
Yeah. Winning is everything. It feels good.
That's interesting, because a minute ago, you said you felt nothing. What? I mean, I believe you even compared yourself to a washcloth. I mean, we all heard that, right, Jack? Did you hear that? You heard.
It on the winner. Okay, well, the view of you all down there is great on my high horse. But look, I meant washcloth in a super good, super fulfilled way. Like a washcloth that is rich with the champagne of a winner. And you drain it out and it's all champagne.
Oh, my God. I'm so glad I use a loofah. Our other top story. We've now learned that sport did not cheat five years ago by disabling Locke's cannon with a wad of sports bud, despite what lots of people thought.
Hey, I love you, sport. You can't blame me for blaming you when you're so mean and ugly. No hard feelings, dummy.
That's barely an apology.
I'm sorry you thought I was apologizing.
Wow. In fact, the real culprit was none other than Chronian Crown Prince Boone.
What? No. Says who?
Well, says us. We're reporting it at this moment.
You can't trust the media, Reno. Trust me. I'm in the media, and I make things up constantly.
I can confirm that's true. And speaking of the media, Wildcard promoter and WBN owner Jot Rustin has flown the coupe. He hasn't been spotted now for two days. And can I just say, I called it.
I don't blame him one bit for ghosting people around here. And I'm looking at you, Saunders, are talking unbelievable smack about my guy Jot Rustin. If you're out there, Jot, I got your back.
Well, we are a news organization, agree? So, owner or not, we have to report what we know, even if that's bad for our bomb.
But not what we don't know. And I don't not know anything. I don't dislike not knowing what I have no idea that I don't know.
Okay, well, WBN is investigating serious allegations of impropriety. If and when we can confirm it, you'll be the first to know.
Right. But you won't hear it from me, because I'll never say anything bad about that beautiful man, Jot Rustin. And, Jot, text me back. Miss you. Well, that's it for us. It's been a hell of a season with a hell of a partner.
You've been hell, too.
I've been the worst.
You've been the worst. Never seen one worse. We'll see you next time on Wildcard. No professionalism, no multiple write up.
You know what? I've seen worse.
I am constantly at HR. I live at HR.
Well, you do. They do have lots of things, but.
Luckily they got nice gams.